The biggest Don't of life.

Never Plan.
For it will never be as good as you imagined it in your head.
(out line subtly)
(you want a future dont you?)

clearing up like the weather.

Perhaps this is why diarys are usually kept private.
Cuase your inner most feeling are misconstrued into something ugly and untrue.
Not the way you wanted your point to come across.
My intents are not to be the victim, the victim of what?
I have a lot to be thankful for and I make note of that and try to let what I'm thankful for know it.
Don't we all have those days in which we feel and gloomy like the weather latley?
Theres so much on my plate, it's hard to see the big picture.
Yeah i haven't had luck with friends but i've had some.
So why exactly would i try to ruin that?
My newest friendship has been nearly perfect and I've never had anything bad to say it. Been completely honest, and never had a malice thought in my head.
Honestly i care.
So why would i deliberatly call you something far out of anything I've ever thought.
Something that has never crossed my mind.
You'd honestly believe that I'd drop everything and call it over?
No, i don't work that way.
Your my closest friend but to clear up what i was trying to say here goes.
I want to meet NEW people, real people, not to replace the two I have but to add to the two i already have.

Not cause im OVER IT, Not Cause your fake, but to add more reality to our tiny group.
I have nothing to be mad at, nothing at all.
I hope this clears things up.

Fuck.

Theres really not much that interests me anymore.
I don't care for much.
I think I'm going to start caring about myself more
than caring about other people.
Cause I've given most of my energy to pleasing everyone
i forget about myself.
So really what im saying is Fuck the rest of the world
I going to care more about me than anyone else
like the rest of the world does

One is the lonliest number.

I could really benefit from some NEW FRIENDS.
I've had the worst luck with friends.
My friendship is hardly ever valued.
The only thing holding me back is the inability to find such a thing.
WHERE?
Or am I destined to be friendless and alone for the rest of my days?

I'm dealing.

I'm trying to find more things to be happy about.
becuase i can't live making other people happy and just forgot about my feelings.
I suppose it's becoming a little easier dealing with my anger and sorrows.
I just need a little new found laughter.
I'm trying really hard to deal with a lot of things,
and its becoming more and more aperant that dealing with them to make myself happy
means actually doing something about them.
Not waiting for them to fix themselves.
I've felt very confined latley. Like i cant escape what my life has become.
But im starting to see that its Okay to let go of a few things.
Its freeing.
Theres options, and one day is not the end of the world, cause days never stop comming for you to redeam yourself.

My message,.

I have only one thing to say,

and to help me say it, im bringing in celebrity endorcement.


thank you Conor.